“Just Roll with It” Serving up Recipes and Humor

Hello everyone! The Fourth of July is over, so now I have to start concentrating on Halloween. I give out full-size candy bars, so I start shopping in September. I have lots of trick-or-treaters, so I have to get an early start.
I am on vacation, and my brother, his wife, and I went to Branson for a couple of days. We had a great time! We went to Dolly’s Stampede, drove to Springfield to Buc-ee’s, and ate at Lambert’s. Yes, I caught a roll! I couldn’t catch a softball, but throw food at me and I’m a regular Babe Ruth.
We shopped until we dropped at Tanger Outlets. On our way to Springfield, my brother was changing lanes, and I looked over just in time to see we were about to run over a car. I nearly had a heart attack! All I could think about was my mama always saying, “Wear your good panties in case you have a wreck.”
Well, I did have my good panties on that day. But I remember one time I got rear-ended in Fort Smith, and I did not have on my good panties. Did y’all know that when you have an accident in Fort Smith, even if it’s just a little bump, they call the fire department? I mean, we were sitting on the side of Highway 71 near Walmart, and here comes this huge fire truck with the sirens blaring and everybody staring. It would embarrass some folks, but I don’t normally get embarrassed.
I used to embarrass my sister when we were younger. I’ve always been loud. This is the same sister who’s scared of everything. She can’t even look at a picture of the Statue of Liberty.
One time we were on a road trip and came through St. Louis at night. She got down in the floorboard of the car, covered her head with a blanket, and stayed there the whole time. I kept telling her, “You have to look at it—it’s beautiful!” She never came out from under that blanket until we were completely through St. Louis.
Then there was the time she and a friend drove all the way to South Dakota to see Mount Rushmore. They got there, and she couldn’t even look at it. They made a U-turn and turned right back around!
I still wonder what made her think she could go see Mount Rushmore. You drive all that way and can’t even look at it? Who does that?
When I saw that picture of the couple standing on top of the Empire State Building, I knew they were crazy. But I also knew my sister would never even look at that picture.
I don’t know what I did to her during our childhood that made her the way she is, but somehow, deep in my heart, I know I’m probably responsible.
I’ve been to the Grand Canyon… but not her. Never.
Until next week, y’all try to stay cool. It’s summer in Arkansas, and that means it’s hot!
Hug your loved ones and tell them you love them.
Easy Pecan Pie Bars
1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
1/2 cup unsalted butter, softened
1/4 cup granulated sugar
1/4 teaspoon salt
3 large eggs
1 cup light corn syrup
1 cup packed brown sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 1/2 cups chopped pecans
Preheat your oven to 350°F (175°C) and line a 9×13-inch baking pan with parchment paper. In a medium bowl, combine the flour, softened butter, granulated sugar, and salt until the mixture is crumbly. Press it evenly into the bottom of the prepared pan. Bake the crust for 15-20 minutes, or until lightly golden. In another bowl, whisk together the eggs, corn syrup, brown sugar, and vanilla extract. Stir in the chopped pecans. Pour the pecan mixture over the baked crust and return to the oven. Bake for an additional 25-30 minutes, or until the filling is set. Allow the bars to cool completely before cutting into squares.